Ending Confinement

I'm pushing the end of my 1 month confinement and I'm filled with mixed feelings of joy and worrisome. Joy for obvious reasons that I can lead back a normal life - able to bathe (without herbs), able to go out (I'm developing cabin fever!) and able to eat normal food! The first 2 weeks of confinement were the worst days in my life. My scalp was itchy, my skin felt sticky, my episiotomy wound was hurting and my breasts felt so sore with plugged milk ducts! I was literally counting the seconds hoping that time will rocket pass!

Then again, now that I'm soon seeing light at the end of the tunnel, I'm also struck with anxiety and fear about the ability and energy to handle 2 kids. At times when I was nursing baby Raynen, Rynae would snuggle up to me to request to spend personal time with me or to ask me to attend to her. Those were the times I had to decline her requests as I couldn't split myself into 2! Not wanting her to bear a grudge towards her brother or to feel jealous, I'll always ask her for grace period and will always get back to her after I'm done with baby. She was so used to having my undivided attention these 4+ years so now that I have another little chap to take care of, she'll have to do a bit of adjustment.

I'm finding my air thinner and my time more precious. I reckon I'll be getting much sleep too as I'll have to do the graveyard shift - giving night feeds. Oh... Back to those panda-eyed days again!